Four Years: Chapter 10

White lived in an apartment, a small and humble little place that served its purpose of housing a family of three. A part of N was actually excited, since he never really saw the inside of White's home before. this would be a good chance to learn about her family!  

The main attraction of room was a large china cabinet, carved out of some sort of dark wood that looked like it had been polished several times. On the other side of the protective glass doors were cameras, all arranged according to model, date and type. N resisted the urge to press his hands against the glass to get a better look at the rustic contraptions, but he was afraid of what would happen if White's mother found his fingerprints. It was a silly fear, but N remembered White's mother: how furious she had been when N and the other members of Team Plasma came storming in with the news of his and White's marriage. She had to be restrained because she had banished a frying pan like a weapon! N shook his head and continued to look down at the assorted cameras, each with a little note card saying what they were in slightly sloppy hand writing.

Eastman Kodak Folding Camera.   Russian Folding Plate Camera.   Canon F-1 (Old Type) Navy Camera. Vintage Portrait Camera.

The list went on and on and on, some of the cards had dates written on them, while some didn't. Some looked so old and fragile that they would disintegrate if N dared to open the door of the case. Not that he would.

"I'd step away from mom's camera collection if I was you." White warned suddenly, causing N to jump back in shock and hold his hands to his chest. He looked over to the young woman, who looked just about ready to burst out laughing at the scene. "Trust me. She will flip. Out. If anyone other than herself goes near that collection. She treats those things like her babies." She continued, passing a canned beverage to N, which he clumsily grabbed, before walking over to one of the curtain-covered windows on the other side of the room. "The fact that it's you probably wouldn't help you much, either." White finished as she pulled the curtains open with the sharp hissing of plastic rings on a metal bar.  N swallowed uneasily and fiddled with the tab on his can, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.  He wanted to try and make things right with White's family –like he was with her-- but somehow he doubted it would go exactly as planned. Even if he proved that White was happy, that wouldn't make him look any better in their eyes.

He sighed and snapped open his drink. What was he going to do? What could he do?  He had ruined his first impression.  He took a sip of the beverage in an attempt to clear his thoughts -ginger ale, based on the taste- there had to be something he could do. The Subway Masters had... tolerated him... somewhat.  If one could call being given the cold shoulder by one and having the other be passive aggressive towards you "tolerance." Oh, and there was Cameron! Cameron seemed to be able to stand N! But then again he was at work, and getting mad at N probably wasn't the best thing for an employee to do. N groaned and dumped himself into one of the reclining chairs, placing a hand over his face. He could fix this! He just needed to figure out how.  "You're thinking about my parents way too hard." White commented, N cracking open his fingers to look at White, who was casually leaning against the window pane, sipping at her own drink.

"How did you-"

"Mind-reading." White answered mysteriously, tapping a finger to her temple. She held the facade for a grand total of three seconds before she burst out laughing. "Nah, but seriously. It's pretty obvious. Okay now look. N. Enny-wenny." White said as she strode over to him and sat down on one of the chair's arms. "There is an easy way to deal with my parents. And that way is this..." White paused dramatically, making sure she had N's full and undivided attention.  "Don't act like a high and mighty douchebag." White finished with a casual shrug.

"But I didn't!" N began before he was silenced by White's finger against his lips.

"Up-ba-ba-ba-ba-bap! Don't give me that! Do you even remember the day you took me away?" White asked as she got to her feet and walked in front of N. "My name is N Harmonia, and I come here representing Team Plasma!" White quoted, doing her very best to mimic N's voice. "We have come here to tell you that White will be moving in with me in my castle. And there shall be no questions asked about this turn of events!" White finished, holding her can up in the air like a sword.

"That's an exaggeration," N chuckled.

"No, I'm totally serious. That's how it happened. And then mom threatened you with a frying pan." She laughed into her drink, "you probably blocked out that part from your memory."  N smiled over the rim of his drink. It wasn't that he had blocked it out of his memory- it was that White's recounting of the event seemed to paint N in the most unflattering way possible.  Then again, "N" and "flattering" didn't really go together that well in White's mind.

"Speaking of being serious, N." White began again, her voice suddenly becoming sterner, more 'down to business' like. "About my... problems..." She rubbed at her left wrist. "Let's not tell my parents. Or Nobori and Kudari when we seem 'em again 'Kay?"

"Why?" N demanded, jumping up to his feet. "They deserve to know White. About what you've done to yourself."

"I'm not saying that they don't deserve to know. I'm saying that they shouldn't know." White defended, "you see?"

"No I do not." N replied. "They're your family and friends, White. They should know what you do to yourself!"

"Okay. Look." White said with an exasperated sigh. "This may fly right over your head, O He Who Runs With Pokemon, but 'Hey guys! Did I forget to mention I have to take anti-depressants to make sure I don't jump out a window?' Isn't a good conversation starter."  She sighed again and ran a hand through her hair. "I just don't want them to worry about me. I mean, Nobori already shoulders enough as it is... the last thing I want is to dump my problems onto him."

Nobori. Nobori. Nobori. There she went again, tracing back to Nobori. Why was he so special? And why was N getting so mad about it?It shouldn't effect him this way... and yet it was. Why?

"What makes you worry so much about him?" N asked, the words leaving his mouth before his mind could stop them. "Why do you always think about him the way you do? After all he's done, he doesn't deserve your concern!"

"Why?" White gave a curt, ruefully little laugh. "Because I've known him for half my life. Because despite what you think in your twisted little mind, he is not a bad guy, and he never was. Because he means the world to me..." She trailed off, eyes growing distant and longing. Longing for days that she could never, ever get back. Days spent with him. "If you can't accept that," She said again, her voice strengthening. "Then that's your problem. I'm not asking you to accept it, because you probably wouldn't even get it."  White finished, her tone of voice obviously demanding the end of the conversation. She finished her drink in one last, large swig before wiping her mouth on her sleeve.

N looked down at his own can, noticing that he had dented the aluminum in his grip. He wanted to say something, anything to rebute White's claim and prove that he would understand what she was eluding to. How hard could it be to figure out? Emotions where just the mind's reactions to certain impulses and cues afterall, they weren't that hard to figure out. ...So said the man who couldn't even put a word to what he was feeling. Not quite anger, not quite sadness, and not quite remorse. This feeling only flared up whenever White talked about those two men, specifically Nobori. He put a hand to his forehead and shook it. This feeling would torment him until he figured out what it was, but if he kept thinking on it he probably wouldn't be able to sleep until he got a logical answer.

This was becoming more frustrating than it had any right being.